South Africa

As you all know for Christmas and New Year I traveled to South Africa with some friends I met at Ripple.

First I met Emily in Lilongwe and we headed to Johannesburg via the bus, yes I am far too cheap to fly. The bus was about 38 hours. But it was not terrible. We each had two seats, they were playing movies, and we had some snacks. We now wish we would have taken more food. We had been told the bus was going to stop for meals, yeah that didn't happen. We had chicken and chips at 7am the first morning, then stopped once for some beef and nsamia. It was not too pleasant. We then arrived at Johannesburg around 7pm that night. I was in shock to be in such a big city! I had not been out of rural Africa for six months. After living one month in the village, really roughing it, I was more than ready to get out! We made it to our hotel, it was the nicest hotel I have ever been in, and it was only $20 dollars per night. I was so excited to have a real shower and toilet (which Emily so kindly reminded me that these toilets you do not stand on, you can sit to go to the bathroom), nice sheets, food that was cooked for me, a drink, and an escape from the bugs.

The next day Anna and Emma met us at the hotel. They have been traveling through Africa for three weeks before. We went out and explored town. That night we went up to the roof to have a few drinks before dinner. It was really pretty and had some good drinks so we decided we would come back. Well when we came back they asked for a 100 rand (a little less than $10) cover charge. Being the girl that has been in the village I talked everyone into it. I told them to get all the free drinks we could and our cover would be paid for. We came in and were immediately given free glasses of champagne; I think some of us might have snuck a second one. Then we were invited to the VIP room. There was a “rapper” in the VIP room, he had tons of champagne and hundred dollar bills hanging out of his pocket. I may have told him later that is not even their currency so it looks that much dumber, I am always so sweet.

I decided I was done with the party; I had done my dancing and was ready for bed. I told the girls I would see them later. I went to get into my floor to discover I was locked out. I went to the desk and he had to call a guy to get the key, I went with him to the guy’s room to retrieve said key. Then as we were going up to my room I kept talking about how badly I wanted McDonald’s. The hotel employee said, well you can go get it if you want. I said it is unsafe! He said just empty everything from your bag except the money you need. I asked if we could get somebody to take me, he said he would find somebody. We were still discussing this in front of the elevator when a guy overheard and said, “I will take you anywhere you want to go.” I just stared blankly and said, “Not sure what you mean by that, but I want McDonalds.” He said fine, I asked what his name was, he said Simba. I said, “I will call you Mufasa.” He said, “Don’t.” So we went off to McDonalds, it was about a two minute walk from the hotel. During this time the girls tried to come back to the room. I guess they went to the front desk looking for me. The man said, oh yes, she has gone to McDonalds. They gave the concierge their valuables and came looking for me. They gave the security guard the description of an American girl, with a little bun, a short black skirt and a stripey top. He said he had not seen me. So they went in and ordered McDonalds and asked the lady with the same description if she had seen me, when they added, “she probably ordered chicken nuggets” she immediately remembered who I was. This probably had something to do with the fact that I had yelled, “Of course you do not have honey mustard! I knew you would do this to me!!!” So the girls came back to the hotel to find me in the room eating my chicken nuggets. I still have no idea how I gained so much weight before I came to Africa.

Then we were off to Port Elizabeth, we took an overnight bus there. It was a nice town on the beach. We went for a run, ate some fish and chips, made Mexican food, drank wine, and watched The Croods. It was a nice relaxing day. The next day we rented a car and set off to Jefferys Bay. This is where we spent Christmas. We spent a lot of time on the beach, ate at a Mexican restaurant (I found it on wikitravel, it was highly recommended), went to a bar where Anna convinced the most angry DJ ever to play the Christmas music on her phone (I think he was a little upset when “O Happy Day” played by accident, by we were having a great time), and went for an extremely difficult beach run. It was a good time.

Then we headed down the Garden Route. South Africa is a beautiful country! The best hike we did was Robberg National Park. I found it was one of the top things to do on Trip Advisor. We made the mistake of not setting off until around 11 for our walk, so it was pretty hot out. We took a picnic and ate at the top of a rocky hill where we could watch the Cape Fur Seals below us. The hike was very interesting and at times a bit scary. Towards the end we came out to a very secluded beach, I thought this is exactly where they fly contestants to on the bachelor for their dates. Maybe Nikki will be visiting Robberg soon! It was hands down the most beautiful place I have ever been. The whole hike was along the side and sometimes up a cliff right next to the ocean. It was almost too much to handle. But being hot we walked fast.

We ended up staying two nights at a caravan park. I thought this was the best thing ever! We cooked dinner and relaxed at night while we went hiking during the day. Then we got to Mossel Bay, we stayed at a backpackers there, it was a cool place and everyone was really friendly. We went out to dinner and had the worst service imaginable, we were starving so we asked for bread, our waitress said, “Go help yourself, it is on the buffet line.” We had not paid for buffets. But we took what she said to heart and had three loaves, one we took for breakfast the next morning; I also stole her pen as a form of protest. We felt like hard core criminals.

Then it was off to Cape Town, we took a quick detour on the way to Betty’s Bay. I had to see the penguins! I am sure nobody thought my chanting, “Penguins, penguins, penguins, penguins!!” was annoying at all. We saw the Jackass Penguins, they were cute and some were jackasses, they really need a lesson in bullying. I was so mad that we had to stand behind fences though! I wanted a picture sitting next to a penguin. Seeing those fences were when I realized all of my dreams had been shattered.

We arrived at Cape Town that afternoon. We stayed with Emma’s friend from college and another one of their friends was visiting. It was New Year’s Eve Eve. I thought this meant we would take the night easy, the next day was going to be a big one! I was so wrong. We had a bbq, which included ostrich burgers, it was meat, and therefore I loved it. Then the shots came out. I hate tequila so I protested, I made the terrible choice of saying, “I will do anything but tequila.” This was made into a challenge. I had a mystery shot presented to me about a minute later. My warning was do not smell it, it will make it worse. I took about half of the shot and immediately vomited in his garden. It was gin. I forgot how much I hated gin. After my little throwing up in my new friend’s garden I was the first one to bed (as I was many nights, I am getting old and live in a village. Give me a break!).

New Year’s eve, we went hiking up Lion’s Head. We all started off feeling a bit rough that morning but we successfully sweated out all of the alcohol and made it to the top. The views from the top were amazing! Then we returned to “the hotel” and got prepared for New Year’s. We went and had a late lunch/early dinner with some drinks and a yagar bomb, oh those are not normal to have at five in the afternoon? Then we got ready and headed off to the botanical gardens to ring in the New Year. Our evening started out very civilized and we had a very small area to put our blanket on and (crappy, according to the boys) picnic on. As we started drinking more, our area magically got bigger. Next thing I knew we had so much free space. I think our neighbors were not having the same kind of night we were. But we had a good one that is for sure! It was amazing to spend a New Year’s Eve not in a crowded bar waiting in line for drinks. I think it will be a hard one to top!

New Year’s Day somebody had the bright idea of going wine tasting all day. I had slept about two hours and then was wide awake, so feeling a bit rough. It was a long day, somebody was sick at the first tasting (I will leave out names here), and the rest of us were dragging. I finally called it quits and ordered a diet coke and a jug of water at the fifth winery. I was ready to call it a day!

We declared the second of January an alcohol free day; it was like the heavens open up and the angels starting singing. I had never heard words so sweet. We decided to go spend the day on the beach and go out for Pad Thai that night. It was a good and relaxing day.

So we came to Friday, of course we were going out. We spent the day wandering around town and did a little bit of shopping. Then it was time to go home get ready and start drinking. We went out on Long Street; I had a great night of dancing! That is all I ever want to do. It was fun to be out at bars that are like home, I do not think the nights I have gone out in Mzuzu really count as going out. It is fun, but not the same. At the end of the night I of course thought I needed food. To McDonalds on the way home it was. I ordered 20 chicken nuggets this time, I decided I would accept the fact they do not have honey mustard in South Africa and stick to BBQ. I had to give one chicken nugget away on the ride home, so I decided I would eat the rest of them away from everybody else. I always hate when people take my food, when I am sober I can hide this really well and know that it is polite to share. After a few drinks that etiquette goes out the window, I become pretty similar to a dog that always has to eat around other dogs. I guard it and shovel it in as fast as I can. Yeah it really is a mystery why at home I do not lose weight no matter how much I run.

Our trip was then coming to an end. The last thing we had on the agenda was cage diving with the great white sharks. I was so excited to do this! Our ride was coming to pick us up at 5:00 am. About seven months ago I would have said, “Holy shit! 5am?! Never mind I am not going!” Now I wake up without an alarm not long after 5, so we were up and ready to go bright and early. We had a couple hour shuttle drive out to Gainsbay the great white shark capitol of the world. We boarded the boat and set out. On this trip was a very annoying man from New York. I have never realized how annoying Americans are until you see them in another country. He knew everything about everything; if you had done it, he had done it three times. He spoke louder than any person I have ever met. You know the type. He had some young pretty wife, who laughed at the dumbest jokes I have ever heard, so I am assuming he is loaded. I of course could not even muster a fake smile at his, “Now stay back ladies, I am a married man!” when he took off his clothes to put on his wetsuit. Anyway, after everyone was wetsuited up (How I Met Your Mother reference, sorry I watch a lot of TV on DVD), we waited for a shark. The visibility was so terrible you could not see anything a more than a foot down. So we were told sharks could be circling the bottom and we would not know unless they surfaced. To attract the sharks, they throw chum (fish guts) out into the water. When the shark comes close they have huge fish heads on a rope they throw out and try to bring the shark as close into the boat as possible. At first we did not see anything, and then our driver said he was taking a chance and moving because it was going to get very choppy soon. Once we moved near a different boat we saw they had some sharks. It was so cool to watch them come up out of the water in attempt to get the fish head. Our guide put our cage down so we could get in. I was in the first group to go in. The cage was very different from what I expected. It was half above water and half below; we did not have scuba gear, just a mask. I got in the cage and realized I was too short to reach the bottom, we were shoved tight in the cage like sardines (a perfect snack for a shark), my mask kept fogging up, when I went under I could see nothing, and the waves kept hitting me in the face. I felt like a trapped animal, I wanted out! I waited a few minutes and decided I could not see anything anyway so I asked to come out. It turned out the boat was a great place for viewing anyway. Poor Emma was seasick the whole time, so she did not last very long in the cage either. But Anna stayed in for a long time. Her persistence paid off, a massive great white came right and basically smashed into the side of the cage when she was in it. I was able to get a picture! Taking pictures was really hard because you had to time it just right, you could see the shark for about 1-2 seconds before it came out of the water and it was only out of the water for about the same length of time. So I was pretty proud of some of the pictures I got!

That concluded our trip. Anna and I set off on the bus back to Malawi (she is staying at Ripple until summer, Emma went home, and Emily is traveling with her sister). I had some difficulty with the borders on the way back. First was out of South Africa. When arriving in South Africa I was with Emily, they asked her how long she was staying, she said till the 5^th, they asked me the same I first said the 6^th and then quickly said oh wait I need two more days after that. I forgot that my bus left from Cape Town but just took me to Johannesburg which was still in the country. Well she did not change the dates, I did not realize until after we were out of line, the line was very long! It took us hours to get through in the first place. I figured you get 30 visitors visa free so it should not be a big deal. Well when I went to leave, they saw my visa was only good till the 6^th, I was yelled at and had to stand with a bunch of other people whom had overstayed their visas. The woman was a complete bitch. Alright I get that she is just doing her job and gave me a fine, whatever, I was not worried about that. It was just her attitude. She said, “I am fining you 1000 Rand (about 100 usd).” I said, “Ok but I do not have that money on me now.” She yelled, “You pay when you come back!” I got a bit louder and had a bit more attitude, “I am not coming back. I am staying in Malawi.” She and another woman both started yelling at me, “You are staying in Malawi FOREVER?!” I wanted to say something a bit different than I did, I basically said I am staying for about a year more and have no plans to return to South Africa, it was just a vacation. The woman said, “Well what would be best is if you never came back!” Talk about hospitality. So I had to sit with a bunch of people and wait to sign my paper saying I would pay the fine before I returned to the country. I figure there are more places to visit other than South Africa and Illinois (unpaid speeding ticket) right? The bus host, kind of like a stewardess on a plane, was the same man I had when I travelled down. He told me the woman was just angry because her husband is not the right size, I always knew I liked him. Well we finally made it through and were back on the bus. All was smooth until Malawi. I found out my temporary resident visa I just bought before I left, expires the moment I leave the country. This made me furious because the woman whom issued it to me told me I could travel with it and it would be fine. I have to now get a new one which is another 80 usd! I am still annoyed, maybe they will tell me something different in the Lilongwe office, I can only hope! So finally after five days and approximately 60 hours of bus time we had made it back to Lilongwe. The next day Anna and I went separate ways; I did some shopping and headed back to the village.

Being in South Africa made me think about how hard it is to live in the village. What was the most difficult for me was cooking over an open fire. I could easily start the fire, it was keeping it going while trying to prepare food inside. After running I would not even want to bother making a fire, I would go to bed without eating instead. I was skipping meals quite frequently due to this issue, cooking over a fire three times a day while working is just too difficult. One morning Mr. Mhango came over while I was trying to start my fire, everything had gotten wet because of the rain, I was so hungry and on the verge of tears. He recommended I start using charcoal. It has made a world of difference! The only problem is it still takes a long time. But I usually start the charcoal about an hour before I want to start cooking and I can leave it and do other things. I can also bring the little stove in my house and cook inside! So that part is much easier. I think the rest I just am used to. I have so many clothes, that I do not need to wash them frequently and now I can wash dishes while I am waiting for charcoal to heat up. I also think the beginning is always the hardest part. I am doing many things I have never done before, like cooking over a fire, bathing out of a bucket, and washing all of my clothes by hand. I also believe the rewards are so great that it does not seem like a struggle while I am here. I am loving my boring, very sober (I thought I would never want to drink again after South Africa, but now I think I need a box of wine to keep in the house.), kid filled life. At night I am doing workouts with the kids or going for a run, cook my dinner, am in bed watching a movie by seven thirty and constantly watch the clock trying to decide if it is too early to go to sleep. Most nights I decide by 8:45 it is fine to turn off the movie. I could not be any happier! I do need my time away and to socialize with friends though! After South Africa I feel refreshed and ready to work. Next week I am going to some schools to do HIV education. I am excited to spread a positive message about HIV, cut down on bullying, and increase testing and safer sexual behavior. Let’s hope it does not all go horribly!