Lessons Learned: Part 2 (of a billion I presume)

1. Wear your sunglasses in the taxi, unless you want your eyes full of dust.
2. Eat dinner after 3pm and do not nap from 4-6, unless you want to lie awake long after the other five people in your room are fast asleep. Then you give in to the hunger and think that you can make it quietly to the bag of Gardettos in your little locker. 
3. Second part of step two does not work, you cannot be quiet. Instead you kick a water bottle over, the Gardetto bag is just as loud as opening your smuggled snacks during the movies, every door squeaks, and light floods in as soon as you open the door. Just as long as I get out fast everything will be fine.
4. Last part of step 3 is not true. The two Rodhesian Ridgebacks that live here like to sleep on the benches at night. Every time I chewed my crunchy snack they looked like they wanted to chew me.
5. Do not take pictures. Even if you think that you are being rather sensitive and not shoving the camera in anyone's face or their children's faces, just of general scenes; such as the market. You are not. This is not well liked by anyone. Especially the military man holding the very large gun.
6. Learn to do math. Everything here in the city is waaaay more expensive than I had thought. Oh yes I will take the bacon, cheese, omelet for my breakfast/lunch. Wait that costs me ten dollars?!?! 
7. Wear comfortable shoes for the three mile walk into town, unless you want somebody to feel like they beat you in the calves.
8. When a car sounds like it is honking directly behind you, it is!!! Get out of the way!
9. Cross the road with other Malawians, unless you want to be almost killed.
10. If you want to hang out and drink on a Friday/Saturday night (which I really don't right now), be ready to start at 6 and end around 10:30. 
11. Africa is not really that hot, I only had a small amount of sweat running down my back during my three hour walk today. This generally happens to me in 50 degree weather so I am glad to not come back looking like I ran a marathon.
12. Do not get lost, unless you want to ask the crippled people begging for money on the street where Mabuya Camp is. They do not know, but are the sweetest people ever! The amputee man smiled so brightly and said, "I'm sorry I did not understand." I just wanted to kiss him (thank goodness I didn't, I may have to add another bullet point to my list). 
13. When people give directions to Mabuya Camp from moving buses assume they did not hear you correctly. If it does not feel right, it probably is not right.
14. Just walk back on the same damn side of the road so you remember the landmarks! This is generally the best bet to making it back (I was only slightly lost for a total of ten minutes. I kept telling myself worse case scenario I just get in a cab, they know the five lodges in town well). 

Well I think I have my hostel room to myself tonight!!! I could not be happier, this means I can keep the light on and read while awake if I want. Who are we kidding I am going to charge my computer and watch some
"How I Met Your Mother" just so I feel like I am at home on a sleepless night. If only there were a little Rosie snuggling with me. Tomorrow I think I will be venturing to a soccer game, hopefully I will be allowed and not get in trouble. I also hope I get clear directions to the stadium and do not get lost. I feel it is easy to do because I find myself looking at so many different things, like people, cars that almost hit you, and the ground to make sure you do not step in what smells like and most likely is raw sewage. 

Mabuya Camp: Lodge where I am staying

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I walked a few hours on this road, yeah there are not really sidewalks and yes it is a highway.

Packed mini bus, I almost got hit by one yesterday and jumped into a thorn bush to get out of the way. Funniest thing they ever did see!

I promise I asked this woman for permission to take a picture.

She is tired from me keeping her up last night.

I got the picture of the dead chickens!

Frustrations and Successes (or I think so far)

Today I set out to get a sim card and to attempt to learn how to get registered as a nurse.

So a couple of girls from the lodge where I am staying joined me in walking to town.

I found a sim card, could not open my phone, finally a Malawian was so kind and helped me, then bought the wrong minutes (well I should say units,

when I say minutes everyone looked at me with blank stares).

Once I got my minutes I tried to call the number I had for the nursing council.

Busy tone, every time.

This used all of the units I bought (that was when I finally bought the correct ones).

So I split off from the girls and went to an internet cafe to try to find the new number.

Walking to the internet cafe alone was slightly more intimidating.

Men were yelling and calling me sweetheart, I did not have many people approach me,

except children begging for money.

But it was still intimidating.

I got to the internet cafe and she told me the internet would be too slow for me and I would not want it.

She looked at the address I needed to get to and told me to go down the street to the mini bus.

I got to the mini bus and they just pointed down the street.

So I walked down the street and a taxi driver approached me, as soon as I pulled out the address book there were about six men surrounding me (none of which know personal boundaries).

I laughed out loud at their wanting to help me, they are all so desperate for business, which is very understandable.

One man told me to come and he would take me there.

He pulled the floor mat off of the wall (I am still confused as to why they were all hanging there).

Then I got in the very damp (confused about this too, I figured I did not want to know) front seat, and we were off.

I always forget that they drive on the opposite side here, every time he turns I think we are going into oncoming traffic, and much like their not knowing personal space they also do not understand the importance of keeping space between vehicles.

At one point I told him that I forgot he drives on the side I am not used to.

He laughed so hard, he said he saw my hands fly up to pull the steering wheel in what I thought was the right direction.

The cab driver took me to the address I thought I needed to be at.

Guess what? 

Wrong effing place.

Thankfully my cab driver waited for me and a woman came out and translated for him.

Then we went to another place.

I filled out a form and payed fees, they gave me a receipt and said thank you I could pick my card up in two weeks. 

This was not right.

So I talked to a woman in the office and she told me that I did my steps backwards.

She came out and translated to my cab driver where I needed to go.

I went to the next place.

The woman told me, yes I have received your emails.

Do you think that she ever emailed me back? 

No.

So then she scolded me for not having come in the morning and for not having my proper paperwork.

She said what am I supposed to do with you now?

Well what the hell do I know?!

Just tell me what to do!

Of course I just pulled the, "I'm so sorry I just do not know what I am doing, I am here and willing to learn card".

She gave me the forms to fill out and said I needed my transcripts sent.

Awesome.

I'm sure getting my transcripts sent right over will be no problem....not.

Well I emailed every single person in the office of registrar at William Jewell.

In the subject line was "emergency transcript request."

I plead my case.

They said I needed to print the form and fax or scan it back and they would be willing to send me an email form of my transcripts.

Oh yes I will print and scan that right back.....not.

The printer here is broken and there is no scanner.

Well I plead my case, filled the form out online, and got clever (at least I thought I was a genius) and wrote my signature on a piece of paper, took a picture with my iphone and sent it via email.

Thank God for the people working at WJC and their mercy on me!!

She said it would work and they would send me the email with my transcripts by the end of the day.

I cannot believe my luck. 

So I am supposed to go back to the office with my paperwork on Monday morning and hopefully things can get squared away and I can be on my way by Tuesday morning.

We shall see how annoyed the woman is with me on Monday.

Cross your fingers that it goes well!

So now it is the weekend and there is nothing I can do. 

I plan to go into town in the morning and check out the market place.

I sat at the bar tonight and a man told me many white women end up marrying African men.

Was this a marriage proposal?

Well he bought my drink, which was a double, double.

I was kind of joking that I normally fill the glass half full of rum (you all know I actually do).

Well this really excited everyone at the bar and they were all watching him pour my drink.

I felt slightly judged.

But hey, it was free and all I needed was one drink for the night.

Another guy (much younger) told me tomorrow he is going to teach me to play a game.

He also told me to find him in the market place tomorrow and was telling me about a concert.

I know that culture is very different here, especially with men towards women.

I will be going very cautious with being too friendly toward men.

I do not want to give the wrong impression and then offend them.

I am planning on attending a soccer game on Sunday, since I will have nothing to do.

It should be an interesting experience. 

I am going to try to take more pictures, I will not be so stressed this weekend and will try to remember!

Well I am off to shower and get in my super comfortable in my suffocating mosquito net.

Tomorrow will be a better day!

And I am happy that I am safe, and have been helped by so many kind people!

The babies are so cute in the way they seem to know to put their butt in the bottom of the sling and their feet up.
Most of them are sleeping while their mother's carry them. I think I have only heard one baby crying.

After I took this picture I realized that child was naked, I love it! This was on the walk to town they were bathing (I assume and doing laundry).

While I sat and waited at the wrong place.

Typical roadside stand. I was pissed that I missed taking a picture of all the dead chickens hanging from the bike.
That will be my goal tomorrow.

Longest day/last three weeks of my life.

I'm writing this while lying under my mosquito net in the hostel.

Not sure how this net and I will get along for the next two years,

I'm already feeling claustrophobic! 

So after the last two weeks of craziness,

and approximately 27 hour journey,

with lots of crying at random times,

I am actually here.

It feels so surreal.

I have also gone on about 30 hours with two terrible forty minute naps and constant back pain.

So who knows I could be hallucinating.

It has not really hit me that I will be here for so long.

I do not need to take a picture of everything I see, go buy everything I see, or rush.

I tried to just take it all in on the drive from the airport to the hostel.

These are the things I saw:

Lots of women with babies on slings on their backs (which I am pretty sure I need, it needs to come with a baby though),

A goat being prepared for dinner,

a girl riding a bike with approximately 30 dead chickens hanging off of the front,

women carrying so many things on their heads,

and a truck with at least thirty Malawians riding in the back.

Keep in mind I am in the capitol and this was all off of the main road.

I cannot even imagine the things I will see when I actually get to start working.

Tomorrow I have to go figure out how to get registered as a nurse and also get a chip for my cell phone.

It is rather intimidating traveling alone to such a foreign place.

I am ensured that it is a safe country.

In order to save money and get the full experience of Lilongwe I plan on walking to places tomorrow.

A native sitting at the bar told me no it was way too far, 

I asked him how far and he said 5-6km. 

I told him if I have ran two marathons I think I can take a three mile walk.

I'm sure he is thinking I am a fat American and will die of a heart attack.

It is funny everyone here immediately asks if I am American.

I am imagining they think I wear overalls and hang out on the farm back at home.

If only I brought my overalls to walk around Malawi in.

Lessons Learned

I have been meaning to write this post for awhile now.

In the last few weeks I have been amazed by people.

Their compassion, kindness, and generosity.

I have also had my strength tested and heartbroken. 

In every situation I have been picked up by somebody.

The first and one of the hardest lessons I learned is that my heart is fragile.

I have always put up a tough exterior and when it comes to people

I can just let things go because I know that they have hurt me and they are generally not worth my sadness.

So I move on.

Having to put Douglas to sleep was the most difficult thing I have done so far in my life.

Pets love us so unconditionally, my dog would never do anything to hurt me.

All he wanted was my love and affection.

Because of his pure intentions and unconditional love, I hurt so badly to see him hurt.

I never knew that I could be so sad. 

Another thing I have learned is that nobody will ever love me more than my father does.

I have the best dad ever. 

He unlike many dads has been so involved in my life, and he has been a single dad for almost ten years now.

I called him no less than ten times the night I had to put Douglas to sleep.

I really felt his love for me when he started crying because I was sobbing so hard. 

My dad did not even like Douglas, he in fact was bitten by Doug once.

They did not exactly see eye to eye.

He supported me so much that day, just as he does everyday.

Even when he does not agree with my decisions (Africa for example).

Another lesson I learned was what love really is.

Loving something means putting every feeling you have aside and solely thinking of another's feelings and best needs. 

If I did not love Douglas I could not have done what I did.

When I told my dad I couldn't do it, he said I had to do it for my friend, he needed me.

Loving something so much is scary.

I am not much of a feelings type of person, I tend to have walls.

That dog broke right through them.

The final lesson I have learned is that people are amazing.

I think that we far too often hear about all of the bad people in this world. 

I have always believed the good far outweighs the bad.

And I have been proven right a billion times.

I have had friends constantly checking on me to see if I need anything.

I have amazing coworkers that understood and sympathized for me

(even the animal haters).

Examples:

A friend was kind enough to bring me food and wine then drive me to the vet that night.

She held me as I sobbed and took care of Rosie when Douglas needed me.

Another friend brought more food and sat with me after I got home.

The next day a friend invited me and Rosie over and bought me lunch.

My roommate gave me flowers and a card (she is also not a dog lover).

My coworkers all gave many hugs, some even cried with me, and bought me food.

I have been so over whelmed by all of this.

He was just a dog, but to me he was so much more.

And people understand and show compassion.

My vet staff was also amazing through this whole experience.

They are such kind and sympathetic people. 

My vet personally sent me a sympathy card, which meant so much to me.

And today I got home and he personally made a donation to the 

Pet Tribute at the College of Veterinary Medicine at KSU.

Douglas and my name are recorded in a memorial book at the library and the gift goes on to help other animals.

I have a feeling they do not do this for everyone.

Through all of this I am doing so much better.

I am glad that Douglas is no longer hurting and I know he had a great life.

Like my dad said, "It is shocking that little shit lasted so long, he should have been dead the day he was running under a dump truck trying to bite the wheels."

Yeah he was a very bad dog.

Rosie has also been helping me cope.

She is the best little dog, she has stayed right by my side.

I am currently contemplating sneaking her into my carry on.

I'm not sure a life of no AC is really her style though.

A huge thanks to everyone that has been there for me!

I love you all and could not have made it without you!

Asshole 1 and Asshole 2: You guessed it, this post is about the wieners.

If you have spent more than five minutes in my presence you will know at least one thing about me.

I have two wiener dogs; Douglas and Rosie.

And yes, they are assholes.

I'm writing this post with a very heavy heart today,

I will try to stop crying so there are not so many typos.

Douglas is currently at the vet, where he spends much of his time.

He is now in heart failure.

Among his many problems I have decided we are done.

I will be bringing him home and keeping him comfortable.

We are going on doggy hospice if you will.

No more new meds, no more tests, just keeping comfortable.

He was having so much trouble breathing last night that I rushed him to the vet this morning.

They have corrected the issue for now but the vet says without medication that he will just get back in the same situation. 

I have decided when that happens it is time.

Well on to the better stuff.

Back in 8th grade I wanted a dog of my own.

My parents were looking for a dog for me but the one they had picked did not work out.

So my mom and I were just making our trip into the pet store like we did every single time we passed.

There was tiny little Douglas.

So stinking cute!

I of course begged my mom and when she said she would have to talk to my dad, I pulled the whole, "How many times has he brought home animals without your permission?"

Yeah you better believe that worked like a charm.

So we bought that cute little dog and headed home.

The breeder gave us some anxiety medicine for him to help make the transition smoother.

This should have been our first clue.

  

I had Douglas for about three months and decided I wanted another wiener so we could eventually breed them.

That is how we got sweet little Rosie.

From the very beginning the two were so in love.

Even with their opposite personalities.

Douglas is obsessive, anxious, active, and not very lovable.

Rosie is calm, lazy, and loves every person she ever meets (except our maintenance man, I still can't figure it out.)

Being the adorable married couple they are, they had lots of babies.

Rosie thrives on being a mother and being in charge.

She has a very tough love style that I will mimic when I have babies of my own.

She was an amazing mother, so much so that she often stole the other dog's puppies.

Douglas on the other hand wanted nothing to do with that shit.

You always knew when the puppies were born because no matter what the weather was Douglas was sitting outside of the dog box (yes believe it or not they lived outside for the first 7 years.)

He was so afraid of the puppies and probably more so of the wrath of Mama Rosie.

Douglas was always a very bad dog.

I am now realizing he was just so bored and did not get the attention he needed.

A couple of Douglas' favorite past times are chasing cars and killing anything he can get a hold of.

I think Douglas' hit list includes; 18 pigeons, a kitten, moles, rats, rabbits, who knows what else.

If it is little and furry he will do his best to destroy it.

We have moved that aggression onto squeaker toys.

I have probably spent about $1,000 in the last three years trying to keep up with the mass destruction.

Douglas also has a lot of anxiety and OCD.

To cope with anxiety he licks things, over, and over, and over again. 

He is obsessed with very few things, his list in order of importance is:

me, Rosie, food, and toys.

I cannot go anywhere without Douglas right there at my feet staring at me.

Rosie is constantly being begged for some ear cleaning.

If he has a toy, it will be squeaked until it does not squeak anymore.

If a toy is stuck somewhere he will do whatever it takes to try to get said toy.

 One of the "indestructible" toys about bought. This was five minutes after he got it.

I left a toy on the bed that day, never again.

Sometimes you have to go to great lengths to protect your bone.

Rosie cleaning Doug's ears as always.

Typical look I get all day.

Rosie is a princess.

That is the best word to sum her up.

I hate finicky and particular dogs.

That is exactly what I ended up with.

Rosie is perfectly happy if she has a soft blanket and either Douglas or I with her.

She is unable to pee or poop in the grass, it tickles her butt.

Running though the grass to chase cats is even very difficult, she chooses the path that is most worn.

Rosie does not enjoy other dogs, except her husband and puppies of course.

One of Rosie's least favorite places in the world is the dog park,

she always finds some human that will have pity on her and pick her up.

Rosie has the biggest sweet tooth of any dog I have ever seen.

I often just shove a handful of candy in my mouth standing up so I do not have to see her bounce 500 times per minute in hopes that she will get a piece.

 Being a princess is hard work.

The wieners have become my little family.

They have been through some of my hardest days with me.

I love waking up every morning with Rosie always on my right and Douglas on my left.

I may never have much room in the bed, but I cannot help but love how they always need to be touching me.

The love they share is unbelievable. 

My favorite part of coming home is being greeted ecstatically.

The big kiss I get from Doug when I carry him down the stairs is the best.

They have been my biggest worry in leaving.

Who will be able to take care of Douglas and all of his needs?

Will they know when the right time is to put him to sleep?

I think that Douglas in a way is doing me a favor.

Seeing that x-ray today and the size of his heart just let me know that it is not good.

I know that his quality of life has been extremely diminished because of his arthritis.
So I have to do what is fair for him.
I am not looking forward to these next few weeks of trying to figure out when it is time.
But I have to trust that he will let me know.
I am just going to enjoy the last little bit of time I have left with him, and hope that I gave him everything he could have ever wanted or needed. 

Even though they are assholes, they are the best dogs I have ever had and could ever wish for and I have loved all of the time I have been able to spend with them.